TIME HAS PASSED. IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE COMFORTING TO HEAR
BUT TIME DOES NOT HEAL US
TIME HAS PASSED BECAUSE THAT'S NATURE THE OF IT
THE WHOLE POINT OF TIME IS TO MAKE US BELIEVE WE'RE GETTING STRONGER OR OLDER OR MAYBE EVEN WISER BY THE MINUTE OR THROUGH THE YEARS, YOU KNOW?
BUT THE HOURGLASS HAD BEEN TIPPED OVER.
IT COULD BE THE 26OOOTH TIME IT'S BEEN TIPPED OVER TODAY,
BUT THE TRUTH IS YOURE STILL IN THAT VERY SAME STATE,
ON THAT ONE FINE DAY OF DAYS YOU BEGAN BELIEVING IT.
AND YOU WOULDN'T NOTICE A DAMN THING BECAUSE YOU WERE TOO BUSY
HOPING THAT TIME WILL HEAL YOU.
WELL. IVE HAD IT WITH THIS TIME BULLSHIT.
THERE'S NO SENSE IN DEPENDING ON SOMETHING THAT ISN'T CONCRETE.
I MEAN WHEN IS THE ACTUAL TIME?
WHEN DOES IT START WHEN DOES IT END?
TIME DOESNT CARE ABOUT US
AS WE ARE ALL MERELY CHARACTERS IN ITS FLUX. IF YOU CAN'T CATCH UP IT JUST LEAVES YOU THERE, SORT OF PROMISING TO GET BACK AT YOU. THEN YOU WAKE UP AND YOU'RE SIXTY SEVEN YEARS OLD IN SOME HOSPITAL BED, CANCER SPREADING AND ALL,
WITH NO ONE TO READ YOU A BOOK
NO ONE TO REARRANGE THE FLOWERS ON THE SIDE TABLE...
AND SUDDENLY YOU REALIZE THROUGH A SERIES OF FLASHBACKS OLD DYING FOLKS USUALLY ENCOUNTER IN THEIR DREAMS, THAT TIME HAS NOT HEALED YOU.
WHY DO WE ALLOW OURSELVES TO SURRENDER IN DEPENDENCY TO TIME?
IF THERE'S ANYTHING AT ALL TO DEPEND ON, DEPEND ON HUMAN NATURE.
IT IS THE ONLY THING TO BE TRUSTED.
THE ONLY THING OUT THERE THAT IS REALLY USEFUL.
IT IS THAT WHICH BROUGHT YOU DOWN
AND FROM IT SHALL YOU PUT YOURSELF BACK UP.
OR I DONT KNOW. MAYBE TIME'S JUST A GUN IN OUR HEADS.
THE THOUGHT OF IT WEAKENS US.
IT FRIGHTENS US TO THE BONE.
BUT AFTER SO MANY TIMES OF PEEPING, GUESSING IF WE'D MADE IT,
WE BEGIN TO REALIZE THAT A GUN'S JUST A GUN UNLESS SOMEONE ACTS UPON IT.
AND TIME'S JUST A COUPLE OF SECONDS AND MINUTES THAT WE TURN INTO LIFETIMES AND YEARS.
WITHOUT THE WILL OF THE HAND TO PULL (OR NOT PULL) THAT TRIGGER
WITHOUT THE WILL OF HAND
WITHOUT THE WILL OF HEART
EITHER WE ARE SENT BACK ON OUR WAY,
OR WE ARE SENT TO OUR GRAVES