A LONGER SHORT STORY TO TELL

LINK TO THE EDITED VERSION OF MY SHORT STORY. ADDED A FEW STUFF AND I WONDER IF IT WAS NECESSARY. WELL IT'S MY FIRST SO CUT ME SOME SLACK. ANYWAY! ILL BE TAKING A CREATIVE WRITING WORKSHOP THIS WEEK SO GOOD LUCK WITH THAT. OK WHO AM I TALKING TO? HEHEHE

http://www.keepandshare.com/doc/2795471/cocounbecomes-pdf-may-8-2011-4-01-pm-54k?da=y